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sometimes i sit at home and wonder
how it be if he had loved me truely loved me yes,
i learned awhile ago that kind of thing
it never happens for me
and so i go around and just pretend
love is not for me
i play the circus clown around my friends
make 'em laugh and they won't see that
you never let them see you sweat
don't want them to think the pain runs deep,
Lord know it's killing me
so i put on my make up
put a smile on my face and
if anyone ask me everything is ok
i'm laughing 'cause no one knows the joke is on me
'cause i'm dyin' inside with my pride and
a smile on my face... on my face
sometimes i sit at home by the phone
hopin' he might call me but he don't call me
but then i realize dreams come true
aren't for girls like me not like me,
and so i go around with my head up
like it ain't no thing and when the boys around
with all my friends i'm into other things 'cause
you never let them see you sweat
don't want them to think the pain runs deep,
Lord knows it's killing me
it's not that easy (thing to do)
sometimes it's hard to (face the truth)
it's not the life that
i would choose but what else can i do
if he don't love me no if he don't want me
i'm not about to sit around let myself go